Women & Body Image

Women, we walk & we talk and we criticize and bemoan. We can't rid of this, that's too big, too jiggly. I remember one time in my life where I was happy with my body image. Unfortunately it was a very low point of my life, and I was not eating and I was exercising, hard, 6-10 hours a week. And not eating, and breastfeeding. That's when I thought I looked my best. How sad.

All through high school I thought I was fat. This was high school graduation. When I look back at this young woman now, there's so much I would tell me.
Not the least of which was to enjoy this body, appreciate it. Most of my friends were very petite, but by many standards I was petite as well, barely 5'4". But they were barely 5', so I felt like an over sized giant. It's all perspective.

This was me during my college years on a trip to Aspen. Again, I thought I was fat. I did not enjoy this body either, I was critical and angry that I did not have the long waist and gradually sloping hips pasted on the cover of magazines. I did not ever notice what I did have, just what I didn't. Do you see how the sweater has so much blousing space between my bust & waist.?  I didn't notice.

And after giving birth to three kids, I felt fat in Hawaii. Yes, I wore a bikini, with a constant cover up. I remember all that week feeling self conscious and lumbering. What was I thinking? What are we thinking?

There have been times I have indeed been fat. My last year of Grad school while I saw over 25 clients a week, plus drove 6 + hours, plus sat in classes for another 6 and ate only at fast food resturants, I was fat. I have the graduation pictures to prove it. After a break-up a few years ago I spent a  while drowning in peanut m&m's. I got fat then too. Since the new year I have been working hard on loosing weight and exercising more. It took 7 weeks to lose the first three pounds. I cannot give up, not just for the weight, but for the health. I have decided that on a day to day basis today, I need to feel good about myself.

I , we, will never be any younger than we are today. Today is a day to choose to feel good about the body we have and all the things it does for us. Even if. No,  no "even if". 

Less criticizing, more appreciating.